With server-side includes. Ask your webmaster if this is supported, and what the exact syntax is for your server. But this will display the local time on the server, not for the client. And if the document is cached, the date will of course be incorrect after some time.
HTML does not depend on screen size. The text will be wrapped by the browser when the end of the screen is encountered. The only exception to this is when you use <PRE>-formatted text, which will only wrap at the line breaks you indicate. So make sure these lines are no longer than 70 characters, otherwise text mode users will see ugly line breaks on their terminals. And users of graphical browsers might have to scroll horizontally to see the rest, which is one of the most hated things to do when you read a document.
Of course, an image cannot be wrapped, so you have to be careful with that. It seems that 400 or 500 pixels is a reasonable width; anything above 600 will mean a certain percentage of users will have to scroll to see the rightmost bit. This percentage increases with your image width. Keep in mind that not everyone runs his browser at full screen!
You can’t. Although each request for a document is usually logged with the name or address of the remote host, the actual username is almost never logged as well. This is mostly because of performance reasons, as it would require that the server uses the ident protocol to see who is on the other end. This takes time. And if a cache proxy is doing the request, you don’t get anything sensible.
The most reliable way is to put up a form, asking the visitor to fill in his e-mail address. If you offer him something in return, he will most likely do it.
You don’t. HTML is not a page layout language. It’s up to the browser to decide where and how to insert page breaks when the document is being printed.
However, style sheets (not widely supported yet, although Microsoft’s Internet Explorer is beginning to use it) will include support to indicate preferred balls for page breaks, probably somewhat like the way LaTeX handles this.
The best way is probably to include a version in preformatted text. This can be seen by any browser, including Lynx.
If you absolutely must have a table, check out Alan Flavell’s document on tables for a good discussion.